What I'm really afraid of is becoming one of those bitter senior citizens who talk about "kids today and their newfangled technology." I've already caught myself scoffing at Twitter users (mostly because I have no idea what purpose it serves), I still think print books are far superior to a Kindle (that's probably the librarian in me), and up until yesterday I resisted getting a Blackberry because of the comfort level I had achieved with my mobile device of 2 years.
Well thanks to the incredibly convincing and overeager salesman at the Sprint store, my father (one of the most frugal men I've ever met) was miraculously convinced to upgrade his plan. As such, my sister and I were entitled to our choice of smart phones - a term I've come to whole-heartedly disagree with as I feel nothing but stupid when I attempt to operate said phone.
When asked about my progress in the last day, I could not help but spew my frustration to other crackberry users.
First of all, every time I turn around the stupid red light is blinking, alerting me to some incoming message. On my old phone the "1 missed alert" message used to excite me as I wondered who could have called or texted. (Odds are it was someone I was avoiding, but still.) Now, all I feel is dread. My home screen seems to be perpetually filled with tiny little asterisks and envelopes... none of which I understand.
Did I just receive a text? an e-mail? a Facebook message? has someone BBM'd me??
(Is our generation really making BBM'd a verb???)
On top of all that, this thing makes more noises than a horny farm animal. This morning I woke up to some horrid sound that too closely resembled a foghorn and resulted in me practically falling out of my bed (sadly, this wouldn't be the first time I face planted on my bedroom floor). Yesterday, I let the phone ring for 10 minutes because I was so unfamiliar with the tone that I assumed it was my neighbor's TV on its highest volume.
Moreover, I've somehow managed to download the Pandora application, which apparently incurs additional data charges - so much for my "all inclusive package."
I've inadvertently signed into AIM - a program that I haven't used since 2003 - so if you've IMed me recently without a response, blame the berry.
Lastly, I'm annoyed to an unhealthy level about the redundancy of having to clear alerts for e-mails that I've already read on my computer.
I suppose the moral of the story is that payback's a bitch. Clearly, I should have had more patience with the elderly people in my life as they attempted to master the technology they were forced to adopt.
I can honestly say that I understand how my German grandmother felt the first time she encountered a microwave. She stared at the appliance in such a perplexed state you would have thought she was trying to cure cancer right there in her kitchen. In retrospect, I wish I hadn't been such a sassy 7-year old when I hopped up on my step-stool and showed her how it operated.
I'd also like to apologize to the old man in front of me at Pathmark who couldn't quite grasp the concept of the self-checkout registers. (Unfortunately, while I'm sure I could have been of more assistance, I still believe you should have an actual person ring you up to save us all time.)
On a similar note, next time my mother calls me at work panicked that she "lost" the memo she was working on, I'm going calmly assure her that there is no such thing as a mystical black hole of documents on her computer, and help her retrieve it (snickers aside). (I'm also going to start charging her for providing personal IT consulting services).
As for my Dad, I don't think there's enough patience in the world to watch him two-finger hunt-and-peck his way around a keyboard when drafting his brother an e-mail. I'll probably just offer to be his scribe.
And as for me, well, I've turned the blackberry off and put it in my desk drawer for a time-out. Maybe tomorrow I'll be ready to sit down and learn the damn thing without the urge to throw it out the 35th floor window of my office building.
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| Kyle Dunnigan - Old People | ||||
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the current innovation of technology has seriously hindered our ability to communicate at an interpersonal level... whatever happened to calling the girl you just met and talking for 5 minutes about nothing to texting her asking if she wants to hang out or what shes doing tonight; where you you have learned more about her in that 5 minute convo about how work sucks than in the 3 hr text marathon you had with her about the best happy hr to meet at... blah se blah. i'm rambling
ReplyDeleteBradford, You make an excellent point. In fact, I've considered blogging about my disapproval of textual communications in a "getting to know you" situation. I'm particularly opposed to initiating contact with a "hey you" message, immediately followed by a "what's up" inquiry. Ultimately, as a result of the influx of technology, our generation's "dating" techniques leave much to be desired.
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